I’ve had many people tell me that I never get mad, I’m always so positive, or that they’ve never seen me mad.
I’ve also had them ask me many times how I do it or how can they become more positive like I am.
Well, it’s not as easy as I would like it to be because it’s a compound effect of so many little things done over time.
I wish it were as easy as me saying, “Read this list of books I’ve gone through and everything will change!” [I could, and will at the bottom, give you a list of books that can help you avoid negativity tremendously.]
But what it really comes down to is Emotional Intelligence. This is simply being smart and aware of your emotions.
Having Clarity on not only what you’re doing, but also why you’re doing these things.
When someone becomes fully clear on the “Why’s” of their actions, they can see situations completely differently. You can step away from the moment, think sharper, no what you actually should do, and create the better result out of it.
You kind of go all Matrix like on the situation… it’s awesome.
As human beings, we tend to be reactive instead of proactive. We react to things and end up causing negativity with people and situations that lead into bad relationships, negative thoughts people accumulate about you, and over all YOU end up in a bad mood afterwards.
When we’re proactive, we stop and think before reacting. We realize that the situation can be turned around or maybe the thing that you normally react too isn’t actually a bad trait or thing someone’s doing, but it’s the thought in your head that is negative… and it doesn’t need to be!
It’s hard to do, takes practice and will not instantly happen.
But Emotional Intelligence is something we can practice, get good at and create a much more positive atmosphere for ourselves and the people around us with.
The way I utilize this has created more positivity in my life, better relationships, stronger love for people, a stronger passion for the things I love to do, more success in my career, and overall has allowed me to be more present in the moment.
You see, that’s one of the most important things and goals that comes from this…
Too many people are stuck on a screen, playing games, not experiencing things with great people, not willing to give things a try, or enjoying what’s going on right now.
Shit may seem boring, dull or not exciting… but try investing all of you into the moment and watch how amazing things will become.
Stuck at a relative’s house that you don’t know well??
Well, yeah that could be boring, awkward or you may be missing something you THINK is more important.
But why not invest yourself into that moment? You’re already there!
Find out more history about that person, what they do, what they’ve done and what they’re all about. Shit… You may end up having a ton in common!
They’ll ask you back, I guarantee it and after that you’ll be much closer to that person and there is no way in hell you would ever regret something like that.
Before I end this, I want to share my deep personal thoughts on this….
The word of my thought, is FOCUS…
Focus is key, its huge, it’s needed, it’s your grind, and it will lead to your success.
But what happens when you focus too much? On one single goal or object?
You will no longer be present in the important things in your life.
Do not let your goals or what you’re focused on disrupt your personal life, your sense of being present in all the little things and what actually makes you happy.
For the sake of my blog, since I’m a nutrition and strength coach, I will use that subject for example.
If you have a goal to lose weight, be ripped, get jacked, or whatever it may be…
No matter how important you think that may be to you, your current state isn’t change at the moment.
So whether the scale moved, the weights increased, or the bottom of your abs still aren’t showing…
You’re still with your family right now, still with your significant other on that date; you’re still at the social event with your best friends, or whatever you may be doing…
Your life isn’t that goal and the present moment, which is the most important thing in life, is not going to change AT ALL no matter what.
Don’t stop grinding, don’t stop having focus, and do not ever stop pushing towards what you want to achieve.
But DO NOT EVER LOSE CLARITY… ALWAYS BE PRESENT.
My steps to achieving more positivity, more clarity and becoming more emotionally intelligent are:
- Journal Daily. [Your thoughts, emotions, feelings, quotes, etc. Just write]
- Read Something Positive Daily. [Chicken Soup for The Soul is great for busy people, quick powerful stories.]
- Get Off Your Phone and Be Present With Loved Ones.
- Find What Makes You Happy, What You Truly Enjoy and Do It More!
Here is my Top 5 list of books, with links to purchase, I believe are must-reads for achieving happiness and more positivity.
- Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry
- Loving What Is by Byron Katie
- The Leader Who Had No Title by Robin Sharma
- Chicken Soup For The Soul: Power of Positivity
- The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho