After reading the title your problem wondering, “What in the hell will Boom Boom be rambling about this time?!”.
But I promise that it’s worth reading! I mean… It’s always worth reading though right? 😉
All right now straight to the point of this article, listening is unbelievably powerful.
“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” –Stephen R. Covey
I had an amazing weekend learning with the one and only Dax Moy last week during his Mind Map certification course. It was mind-blowing how much I learned about the brain, how to truly speak with clients, and actually about myself.
And it all came from one simple thing that we always over look, listening.
I listened to each person I worked with during the weekend and learned so much about them and helped them learn even more about themselves. It truly was mind-blowing. And when it came time for them to listen to me, I learned a ton about myself and what I truly wanted in life.
It’s amazing how something as simple as asking questions to someone can bring out their true desires in life. One of the amazing things about it is that we all have the answers we’re looking for, we just require somebody else to tell us those answers. But with most people when someone actually tells us what to do or the answer we’re looking for, we act stubborn and do not cooperate.
But when you tell yourself the answer, out loud to another person, you will not ignore the answer anymore. This is why listening is so powerful.
Another thing I learned from Dax, and from learning to listen to others and myself, was desires VS. requires. This means that what you may think is a desire; in reality is actually a requirement.
This happens for many reasons, it could be because of what the people surrounding you expect from you or by the way you were raised. Either way it’s something that is embedded in your brain, but it’s crucial to change that mindset.
Think hard about what you want in life and what you expect to achieve. Now ask yourself, is that what you truly desire? Or is this something that you are expected to achieve?
Many people are expected to find a job and work 9-5, does that mean that’s the lifestyle you want to live? Probably not. That’s why you must learn to find out what you DESIRE, and go after it!
It’s time to ask your self the questions you look to others for guidance about and listen to what your heart and mind tell you. I know it may sound cheesy, but I’ve watched it work and am continuing to put it into practice with others alike.
A great way to practice this is to write it out on paper, this is called sentence stemming.
-During this type of practice you would write a sentence that could lead you to happiness, such as…
I would love my body if….
After this you would write down every single thing that would make you love your body.
Once you’ve completed that portion you would stem off of each sentence including every step or action you could take to accomplish that sentence. Here’s a good example.
I would love my body if…
-I had a flat stomach
-Train more often
-Get a meal plan
-Stay consistent with both nutrition and training
-Use a check book to make sure I’m consistent and staying compliant
-Have a coach
You could keep going on this sentence stem, but I think you get the point. Now imagine doing so with everything you want in life and breaking each thing down in deep detail, you could accomplish anything. And in the process of figuring out how to accomplish your true desires you could also learn a lot about yourself and what you really want in life, I know I did.
This all comes down to the fact that you need to listen to yourself more often, and if somebody needs your help or guidance… shut up and listen to them! You will get so much further in helping people if you can just listen and help THEM figure the problem out, rather than telling them what to do.
“Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have preferred to talk.” –Doug Larson